Parenting | I've become my parents

Browsing All posts tagged under »Parenting«

The janitor’s not a werewolf, and other things you’ve got all wrong

August 5, 2011

Look, son, the world is a confusing place. It’s hard to navigate it with only 10 years of experience under your belt. You’ve got commercials telling you one thing, parents telling you something else, and that kid in class that thinks he has an answer for everything. Who are you supposed to believe? Me. You’re supposed to believe […]

Guilt-tripping your way through parenting: learn from the masters

July 30, 2011

Son, you come from a long, proud line of guilt mongers. Us Jews have been purveyors of fine guilt for thousands of years. It’s one of our primary parenting techniques, and it’s a skill that certainly comes with your genes. This is basically how it works: rather than go through the trouble of teaching our […]

Putting the “Why” in Whining

July 24, 2011

One of the things you’ll realize as you become more and more like your parents is that there are certain questions that we really don’t like. Most of the really big offenders seem to start with the word “Why.” At first it’s all real innocent: “Daddy, why do dogs not fly like birds?” Or, “Why […]

Fresh batch of favorite tweets!

July 22, 2011

Fresh batch of favorite tweets! What’s Operation Pepe le Pissoff? What do I NOT want to come back as after I die? What happened when I promised to tweet naked if I got 100 more blog views? It’s all here!

Don’t bother; I’m just going to say no…again.

July 18, 2011

You ask and I say “No”. You ask again. I say “No” again. You say “Please.” I say “No.” You say, “Please, please, please puhleeeeese.” And I say “No.” You give up. The next day, you’ll ask again. So I’m going to save you some trouble and lay it out for you as clearly as I can. […]