Parenting | I've become my parents

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We’ll love you unconditionally if you just give us these four things

January 31, 2012

Welcome to this week’s installment of WTF Wednesday, where our advice is made with 100% real ingredients in mind. Today’s question comes to us via the magic of Google’s Let’s Track Every Move People Make On The Internet program. Earlier this week a thoughtful child found I’ve Become My Parents by typing this question into […]

How to scare your neighbors and slow puberty at the same time

January 25, 2012

Welcome to WTF Wednesday, where advice is completely free for the first six months if you commit to a ten-year contract and agree to pay whatever I decide you should during that time. This week we were cleaning out our closet and found a few answers under a pile of dust bunnies and long-lost socks. […]

Getting in touch with your sensitive side(s)

January 20, 2012

This post was originally published in the spring of last year. It was one of my very first posts. I’ve reworked it a bit for the I’ve Become My Parents book. Enjoy. Getting in touch with your sensitive side(s) OK, so you have my genes and, as you’re learning, the package comes with a number […]

It’s not my fault that you take no responsibility

January 15, 2012

OK son, it’s time to take some responsibility for your actions. You say it so often it’s become a single word: itsnotmyfault. Well guess what: that’s actually five words. Let me break it down for you: it n. The thing I’m pissed about. is v. Short for “is the opposite of what you’re telling me.” not adv. […]

Five benefits to keeping your child on a leash.

January 11, 2012

Welcome to another edition of WTF Wednesday where we give really good Bad advice. This week’s question comes from Matthew Peregoy, a.k.a, @realmattdaddy, proud owner of The Real Matt Daddy blog, who writes: Dear IBMP, Do you think that it’s okay to use a toddler backpack leash thingy? Matt, like all useless information, the answer […]

How to potty train your child in time for Senior Prom

January 4, 2012

Welcome to another instalment of WTF Wednesday where you provide the questions and I provide other stuff. Today’s question comes to us from nevercontrary who writes: Dear IBMP, I am about to start potty training my daughter. Any tips, advice, or suggestions? Nevercontrary, it’s interesting that you’re looking for ways to get your child to use […]