What is comment spam? And why it’s going to help me publish.

Posted on November 10, 2011

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Spam critical acclaimSpam. We’ve all heard of it. Email spam, text spam, Twitter spam, spam and eggs. Spam, in most cases, is just plain annoying. Remember FAX spam?

But maybe we’re thinking of it the wrong way. Have you ever stopped to read the spam those robots worked so hard to prepare for you? Well, I do and I’m glad. Here’s why:

It’s been an awesome 6 months so far, thanks to the IBMP readers. The blog is growing and getting more recognition. One important group whose attention IBMP has captured is known as the Comment Spammers. What is comment spam? If you have a blog you know these guys: they clog up our reader comments with ads disguised (poorly) as compliments. They’re hoping you’ll be so thrilled by the awesome review of your blog that you’ll click on the link they so conveniently supply and then, still drunk on the sweet antifreeze of their complimentary comment,  you’ll want to give them your credit card to purchase some crap that you’ll probably never receive.

Most of the time our spam checkers catch them before they go live so readers don’t get to see them, which in some ways is a shame because they’re usually so lame that they’re pretty funny.

But some day, sooner rather than later, I want to sell the IBMP book, and one thing agents and editors love to see is strong critical acclaim for the work. So I now temporarily shed my charming, really sexy and truly genuine modesty in order to let these comment spammers speak on my behalf.

Critics from around the world agree:

I’ve Become My Parents is the Comment Spammers’ smash hit of the century!


“Last many days I am searching some good article and I am very glad to find your article. This is very essential and informative information for me. I would like to say your post is superb and relevant my topics. “       — MLM Software India

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Choottdon raves:

“Customers that are scout’s honour agitated here speeds that a viewer can discern their locale, necessary to consider how self-indulgent the servers are.”

Translation: “Wow, IBMP is totally awesome. While I’m usually completely self-indulgent, I’d love to be your server. Scout’s honour.”

——–

“friend i find your blog very informative.”       –— MLM SOFTWARE NOIDA

“Различные торренты, игры, музыка, фильмы.. [url=http://r-torrent.ru/] торрент скачать наша раша 5 сезон”       — Telotweft

(OK, we don’t exactly know what that means but we’re pretty sure it says, “Try the olives, they’re fresh off the trees. Oh, and IBMP is good.”)

———

ugg boots sales says:

“This is a truly good study for me, Must admit that you are 1 of 1 of the right bloggers I actually saw.”

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“Good write-up”       — P2P4U Man United

 

“Hi this is kind of of off topic but I was wondering if blogs use WYSIWYG editors”       — Riots

 

“That is my first post on this board. I would be happy if somebody could help me with that issue.”       — MoodyMadleine

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How the gods behave with their power proves their moral vacancy:::Monkey see monkey do calls IBMP:

The Meaning of Life”

——–

“An Good post with nice ideas.”       — promotional company gifts

“I was looking around for a long time for something that would probably fit the bill and it took me a while yet today I count on communicating with those who find themselves like-minded.”       — michellep6i1

 

“Welcome everyone.”       — MoodyMadleine

 

“I just found http://www.bloggerfather.com by suddenly dropping by online, and found it is so sweet. Keep up the great work!”       — tutoringsg

(OK, so that’s not IBMP, but I’m sure they feel the same about IBMP.)

——– 

…and See Justin and Selina nude Video exclaims: 

“Justin Bieber and Selena tit poped out you can see this @ my web site”

——– 

With critical acclaim like that, who wouldn’t want to publish I’ve Become My Parents, purchase the film and TV rights, action figures, line of children’s underwear, bobble heads, snow blowers, Lego series, IBMP Easy Bake Oven, bottle openers, multi-vitamins, doggie sweaters, haemorrhoid cream, electric garage door openers, fireplace sweepers, and Toddler Tantrum Emergency Kits?

OK, I may be getting a bit ahead of myself; I don’t even have the doggie sweaters designed yet.

Fellow bloggers, feel free to provide some examples of critical acclaim for your blogs below. I’m guessing that I’m not the only one the spammers like…