It’s IBMP WTF Wednesday! Ask the expert. I should know; I have a blog.

Welcome to the first Want The Facts Wednesday, or as we like to say, WTF Wednesday: bad advice delivered expertly.

Today’s question comes from Party in Peoria, who writes:

Dear IBMP

What does it mean when my 4 year old son walks around saying that there is a party on his penis? Should I call a doctor or a party planner?

Hi Party. Great question. I get this question all the time. It sounds like you left your bedroom door open one night when you thought your son was sleeping. You and your wife really need to be more careful. I did that once and for months every time I’d ask my son to do something like clean his room he’d say, “Not tonight Daddy, I have a headache.”

To avoid future problems of this sort, I recommend neither a doctor nor a party planner. What you need is a good locksmith, some more discretion and perhaps a less imaginative sex life.

Don’t worry, your son wasn’t nearly as traumatized by what he saw as you were when you heard him declare that there’s a party on his penis in front of your mother in law. He’ll soon forget it. You, on the other hand, may not be so lucky.

Glad I could help!

What’s your question? The doctor is in, he’s just not in here.