Listen, son, let’s be clear about this: your job as my son is to make me feel better about myself by being the kid I wished I had been. You’re supposed to make up for all my youthful shortcomings as I re-live my youth vicariously through you. See, you are my “If I could do […]
October 23, 2012
Son, you may remember me telling you that there are two kinds of kids in middle school: those that are miserable, and those that make them that way. I was both. In short, that’s because nobody else had to make me miserable; I did it just fine myself. And I didn’t even wait until middle […]
May 20, 2011
Son, we have established that if you grow up to be like me, you’ll never actually ask anyone out in high school. The bummer, of course, is that your lack of any real experience won’t exactly build your male confidence over time. The result will be both a growing desire to seek a girlfriend […]
June 9, 2013
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