Browsing All posts tagged under »nursery rhymes«

Beware the vengeful squirrel

July 29, 2013

29

I get it: you’re scared to sleep in that room. First of all, son, they aren’t dead pet bunnies; they’re dead pet bunnies’ ashes. And the boxes are totally sealed. How evil could the ghosts of dead bunnies be, anyway? What’re they going to do, wiggle their little ghost-noses at you until you piss yourself with fear? […]

How Disney made me a liar

January 18, 2013

21

The floor under the seats of the local movie theater where I grew up was really quite remarkable. Decades of non-diet soda coated the concrete with a thick layer of sweet syrup. It was like flypaper that caught only popcorn and blobs of gum.  I know this because I spent a lot of time under […]

A fresh batch of favorite funny tweets

September 16, 2012

4

If you do the Twitter thing, you know that any given tweet lasts about 10 seconds before it disappears into the ether like a Jennifer Lopez movie. Every once in a while I gather up a bunch of tweets and give them a second life here on the blog because I just can’t bear to […]

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